Have a Horrorshow weekend, oh my Brothers.

See what I did there??? Oh, aren't I cool!

Have a ball this weekened. What are you all doing? tell me, do!

I am going to a fireworks party tonight with some rather fab and fun people. If I survive to tell the tale, I shall meet you at midnight on the dark side of the moon....

Over and out! x

Blogging about dogging, a nice cup of tea, and some biscuits

"Hob-Nobs are the SAS of the biscuit world"

- Peter Kay -


This is a little story I heard from my friend.

Two naïve friends of his were up them hills having somewhat of a smoke when a parked camper van flashed it's headlights at them.

"What's this?," they said, thinking the occupants were in some sort of trouble.
"We'll go investigate"

So, the duo went over to investigate.

A man opened the camper door, beckoned them in, and said "would you two like to have some fun with my wife?"

Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, they went at it with wifey while mister 'watched and wanked'.

This is the clincher:
Afterwards, he politely asked them if they would like a cup of tea.

How English!. How lovely. A nice cup of tea. It does, after all, make sense to have a camper devoted to your outdoor sexual pursuits, and to have a ready supply of condoms, tetley, sugar, and milk.

I applaud this behaviour.

I wonder if they had biscuits?

I love confectionary, that and condiments.

Fin.

I have someone to play with this coming Monday...

Fancy a little pick me up?? Fancy 2 ladies doing so - at the same time??

Selena Saunders is joining me this Monday and we are anticipating one fun packed day of merriment, decadence and lascivious behaviours....

Her site is http://selenasaunders.co.uk/home.html. I do hope you can pop over and say and treat yourself. It's nearly christmas so you're allowed...

Call me for rates etc.

Picture above is of me in the new corset... well, one of them! x x

In Reading this weekend??

So am I!

If you are about this Saturday and Sunday in Reading, you should pop over to say hi.... I am doing some special rates this weekend you really, really need to take advantage of....

1 hour - £120
2 hours - £200!

Give me a call!

07749088578.

I am located near Russel St in Reading and have secure, gated parking. Fluffy towels, bathing and all that jazz available - fun compulsary!

I am working from 10 ish tomorrow. See you then! x x

Look what I got today!

How gorgeous is that?? The lady that got me into corsets was Carina from Reading. Some of you still remember her? She was so exceptionally beautiful I used to be in awe of her when she got all dolled up. Anyway, she taught me all about steel boned corsets and how to put them on and I have been hooked ever since.

They are so feminine, aren't they? And I just love white - it goes nicely with my tan and pink hair! x x

For DW part three....

...Well well....

Sophie and I are looking forward to Monday. I hope you are ready for us??? x x

Naughty me.....

I did something really wild last week in Greenwich you might like to hear about!

Before I tell you, I have to say this is pretty much out of character for me. These days, anyhow.... Let me explain:

So, after spending a lovely evening at the O2 with my best friend Coral, (who says hello by the way!) I ventured back to this totally enchanting little pub which had a hotel attached to it. It was ten-ish, and feeling a little bit merry and in good spirits from my friend's company, I went inside the bar.

As I entered, I suddenly felt a little intimidated, a feeling I hardly ever feel! There were about 15 or so rowdy builders from Ooop North, clearly working in the local area and just getting a little bit merry themselves. I was in two minds to just go up to my room, but I thought to myself "How fun will it be to have this lot eating out of my hand by the end of the night....". So I waltzed in, ordered a drink and took in the electric atmosphere.

Being the practically only female in the pub, it wasn't long before I was joined by a few of them. We got talking, or rather I got interrogated! "What are you doing here all by yourself?? Where's your fella then?" I was loving it, and the devil inside me was sitting on my shoulder and encouraging me....

They were such lovely guys and great company. Every five minutes or so one would talk to me then pat a colleague on the back and say "See him? He is a top bloke... blah blah..." It was clear they all knew each other very well and it was turning me on a little to see a sort of pack element forming between them. They could see from my signals I was up for... something, and this made them behave in a total alpha male-esque fashion. Downing drinks, talking about themselves, flirting with me... I love all that sort of stuff, it fascinates me.

An hour and a half of flirting and hair flicking later, the night inside the pub was drawing to an end. I was feeling apprehensive, adrenalised, turned on and pretty wild! I was having so much fun and I didn't want it to end in just the bar.

"So..." I said, "I am going up to my room now, but I will be needing a couple of you gentlemen to come and check for spiders for me.."

I selected the two I liked the most and we all went off upstairs, bottle of wine in tow, inhibitions and decency were left on the mat outside....

I felt so in control, but completely out of control at the same time which is a fantastic feeling. Being a woman alone in a hotel room with two complete strangers is normally childsplay to me, but this was completely different, it felt so raw and dangerous. I felt intoxicated by the moment - a memory I shall cherish forever. I don't want to really delve into the graphics and mathematics of what happened (christ, how Punternet field report does THAT sound?!) as I think imagination is a far superior tool than facts, but it's made me want to do it again, and more often! Basically that was one of my sexual fantasies coming true and I still feel fucking horny as hell about it!! I didn't even know their names, and I didn't want to know.

I don't normally 'do' one night stands because they are ALWAYS shit. A lesson I learned years and years ago. Besides, being an escort provides you with (usually) great sex, so a drunken fumble with an unwashed random who just wants to get off any which way possible with no regard to your desires is never preferable, or comparable. With my penchant for older men as well, they don't tend to hang about places like the Purple Turtle.... Shame!

I shall leave you with a real adrenaline pumping song which every single person I know loves.

Hannah the slut, over and out!! x x x